High Heels or Flip Flops

I've been reading Sheila Walsh's book, "I am Not Wonder Woman, but God Made Me Wonderful", and today's chapter talked about our personalities and likes.  Sheila got to talking that before we became adults we were children who had personalities that often times were changed by society.  She compared the ideas to being a high-heels kind of woman or a flip-flop kind of woman.  Before reading it, I was thinking, I am a high heels kind of girl.  I like dresses, being cute and feminine, and going out in nice heels.  But then after I read the bit about childhood, I thought about how I dressed the majority of my life as "not so much a dress" kind of girl.  In high school, people joked I could be up for best dressed as I worn a unique combination of sweat pants each day.  I liked being comfortable.  There's that word again, "Comfortable".

Then I looked at my closet.  The most worn out shoes were not really high heels at all, they were fake Ugg boots, Reef flip flops, and my running (more so walking) shoes.  Well, I guess I am not really a high heels kind of woman after all, but what does that mean for my life?  If I lose that Sorority image of what is "the best" and come back to what is comfortable, will I be happier?  If I stop trying to be the best, have it all, and be so successful will I feel more comfortable?  Is God's purpose in my life to be comfortable?

So where on the journey did I get my vision all mixed up?  When did my value come from the success of the high heel and not the realness of my flip-flops.  When did I become ashamed to admit that I actually HATE high heels, but I love my Reefs?  Some how the metaphor was not so much about shoes anymore...

Today, I am going to try to be more of who God made me to be in this journey.  I am going to take off these high heels at work and I am going to try to just be myself.  In 72 hours, I won't work at Bethany anymore but yet, I haven't been comfortable to sleep or really enjoy life for months.  Today, I am going to try to remember that God made me unique and to be comfortable I need to be less high strung, less high performance, and less high expectations.  I know when I think back to my 5 year old Kerrie self I was easy-going, loved life, was relational and open, creative, helpful, curious, courageous, and very messy.  Maybe today I can allow myself to be a little bit more of that... all except that really messy part... maybe I grew out of that... :)