Motherly Instincts

Since I started working in the schools, I feel like a little motherly instinct has gone from relatively average to full-blown mother duck.  So many of my kids that I work with are often times bounced from house to house with mulitple caregivers.  Some of my children are at school from 7am for before school care and stay until 6pm for after school care.  Some of them tell me they don't have breakfast, and if they do, they eat cheetos or chips.  Some have no bed time, no clean clothes, or no consistancy for much of anything. Day after day I am put into awe when a teacher tells me another story of their students life.  I say, "wow" and "that's horrible" quite a bit. 

Even though both my parents worked full time when I was growing up, I feel like they poured a lot into me.  Even now into my adulthood I find myself thinking of the "norms" my parents taught me: you need to have cereal or a breakfast food in the morning not junk, take a bath daily, brush your teeth, put on clean underwear, you can't go without a coat if it's under 50 degrees, you cannot wear shorts until it's 65 degrees, you need to show us your homework before bed, you need to go to bed at a decent hour, you don't hit people, etc etc etc.  The kids at my school seem to have their own culture, the culture of poverty with messages saying: every man for themselves, if they hit you then hit them back, no one tells you what do to except your momma.  Or maybe the messages that aren't said are the ones that are more influential like "I love you" and "you mean the world to me" or "you can do this if you try hard".

I find myself patting more kids on the back or head, asking "how was your day?" and praising the smallest things.  When they hug me I feel all warm and not annoyed they are slowing down my progress.  I find myself making sure they were doing ok in class and asking if they got their work done.  I point out untied shoes or the teen wearing flip flops in the middle of winter.  I find myself turning my job into a ministry of compassion, care and love.  And the clients continue to pour in....This unconscious awareness to teach, protect, provide and love is growing immensely.  People who make it out of these situations in life usually say, "there was one person who believed in me and told me I was worth something".  I want to be that one person that these kids feel really cares about them because they deserve to feel worthwhile.  They deserve to feel like someone cares when they come home.  I know my family was not perfect but I never felt like my parents just did not care whether I was ok or not.  I never felt like my parents were so into their agenda that if I was hurting they still wouldn't care.  I always knew they would provide, protect, and support me.  Seeing where I am today, I just know that those little motherly moments of love, support, teachiing and correction were what made me someone who is able to love in return today.  If only those who were so blessed could realize what a need there is to love others. 

Never has my favorite quote from Mother Teresa felt so true in my life:  There is hunger for ordinary bread, and there is hunger for love, for kindness, for thoughtfulness, and this is the great poverty...

We can give kids new clothes and school supplies in August in cute little back packs, we can send food to their food pantries, and pay our taxes for their health care, but if we never take the time to love them, support them, encourage them, then they will never have the hope to change themselves.  I pray motherly instincts kick in for more people who are privaledged to love those who need it most...  Just some thoughts from the day...